Month: January 2020

Women Platform High Stilettos Heels Sandals Round Toe T-Strap Shoes Pump

Women Platform High Stilettos Heels Sandals Round Toe T-Strap Shoes Pump

I love these as they have a very classic shape to them but the vibrant shiny orange and green colours are, oh! fabulous. I wouldn’t normally look at colours like this but I went out with my friend Hayley and she had a pair of sandal type shoes in the orange and they looked amazing even though they were flats.

If anyone wants to buy these for me I’m a Euro size 43 but I would like both colours as I cant decide, orange or green.

Womens T-Strap High Heels Bowtie Mary Janes Stylish Lolita Shoes Pumps

Womens T-Strap High Heels Bowtie Mary Janes Stylish Lolita Shoes Pumps

The colour, the colour, the colour and that T-strap. Oh and the white lace effect round the edge. These look fantastic.

If anyone wants to buy these for me I’m a Euro size 43 and i’d  like them in Red please.

Womens Platform Buckle Bowknot High Heel Block Pumps Mary Jane Lolita Shoes Chic

Womens Platform Buckle Bowknot High Heel Block Pumps Mary Jane Lolita Shoes Chic

Suede look, vibrant colours. That pink is gorgeous and I love the design of these shoes. Dorothy’s shoes without the sparkle maybe?!

If anyone wants to buy these for me I’m a Euro size 43 but I couldnt make my mind up which of the two above colours.

I love to shop for shoes. I completely understand why other women and men love shopping for shoes. I love to find different styles and sometime I fall in love which what I find straight away and have to have them. Sadly my financial situation is not compatible with the list of things i’d like to buy so here a list of beautiful shoes I’d like to buy and here they will stay until I can afford them or perhaps someone takes pity on me and buys them for me.

Mow Cop photos

I’ve been walking the dog round Mow Cop lots recently and heres a few sights, sun rises and sun sets from the past few weeks. There’s also a few night shots.

I’ll be adding to this page in the future.

I’ve taken my friends for granted

So, it hits me out of the blue and I admit it I have abused my friends. Abused my true friends over the past few years, probably longer as relationships and work sometimes meant friends got pushed aside. Alas no more and my friends and family will be given higher priority in my life.

In the past 3 years I’ve experienced a divorce, relationship breakups, break downs in business relationships and loss of friendships because of a mix of the above or because of what others think I should do.

No more!

I value my friendships now like they were precious jewels.

Why we need best friendsNo! More precious than precious jewels because at the end of the day precious jewels are just expensive bits of rock or minerals pulled from the earth. Inanimate objects which ultimately for a financial exchange can be replaced. They have no function other than to look pretty or say, “look at my bling!”.

Friendship on the other hand are more than that. Friendships, true friends are irreplaceable and will be there for you no matter what.

The ability to spend time with people you love and care for, chat and discuss the world, discuss your/their problems, discuss your/their thoughts, play music, talk rubbish, talk about those deepest thoughts, share stuff, share your life and care for each other.

I know that’s what a relationship is but multiple friends = multiple faceted relationships and when all your friends are also friends with your other friends this makes an amazing bond.

New Years Eve 2019/2020 to me was like being slapped around the head when over 30 of the people I have know for over 20 years where all in the same room and were all conversing with each other. I was bloody amazing and I loved being part of it and it was one of the best New Year’s Eve’s ever with festivities going on for almost all of New Years Day.

Since February 2019 I’ve been on what can only be described as an emotional rollercoaster with massive ups and downs and my friends have helped me through some of the very worst time. When I was at my very lowest they’ve picked me up, discussed things with me, let me talk, listened, offered advice and helped me climb out of the hole I’d ended up in. 2019 was both the happiest year of my life, followed by the saddest year of my life.

So, I’ve found that over the past few months getting off my arse and going seeing friends I haven’t seen for years has been a real eye opener and sitting with some people I haven’t spoken to for 20 years has been like 20 minutes. We’ve just picked up and carried on like the past 20 years haven’t passed and I’ve missed some of them so, so much.

Never again will I forsake my friends and I’ve actually found myself saying “Love you mate” to many of my long term friends, just so they know how much they mean to me. I’ve also discovered that true friends don’t say. “see you later”, “night” or all that shit that’s associated with saying “good bye”. You just leave each other, and you pick up where you left off the day, week, month, years before.

I’ve been chatting to a good friend of mine recently and she texts me nearly every day and our conversations are like we haven’t been apart. Even if that time apart is but for a day or a week.

Even if we just say “Hey, how’s your day?” something which hit me like a thunder bolt when I was really ill recently. So much so, that when I didn’t reply to messages for 24 hours, she actually drove round to my house to make sure I was okay as she couldn’t raise me on text or the phone. She stood hammering on my front door till I answered.

She has also been brutally honest with me and told me she’d kept away from me in the past because of my past relationships, which made me very sad!

Family isnt always BloodI have recently met up with some friends from my teenage years over the past two months and after a great day out in Manchester we all commented on how great it was after not seeing each other for 27 years. It was like we’d never been apart. When we were in our late teens we used to hang about together until work, marriage and families got in the way but 5 minutes after we’d met up, it was like we hadn’t been apart for so long. We had talked on Facebook in the past but that’s just not the same as being with folk in person.

We’re all older and fatter and a some of us are a little balder but we just picked up where we left off and chewed the fat about life, the universe and everything.

The emotional overload for all of us was a bit much if I’m honest and tears where cried when we discussed past events which effected us all. Such as the friends who are no longer with us and events which could have ended all of us.

I’ve also connected on another level with an amazing friend of mine. A friend who has always been distant because there is always someone else with one of us when we meet and perhaps this has been why sometimes we don’t talk as much.

It has been said because of the connection I have with him and the way we interact together over the past few months that he is now more at peace with himself when we’re together than he is with other friends. I probably know more about him than many of his local friends and his wife has said when I’m about he is happier to talk, more open, more relaxed. We do have a bloody good laugh together and this is something we haven’t been able to do when I’ve been round in the past because there has always been a barrier there. Not in a bad way but because neither of us are as open when others are present. Maybe we are at ease now with each others partners but I’m glad I’ve taken the time and made an effort to get to know his wife so much better over the past few months.

As my life has changed over the past few months and I embark on a different direction my friends have stood beside me and supported me in a way I’ve never experienced before. They’re almost honoured that I have confided in them about things in my life and I couldn’t have done what I have without their support since September. The happiness I have got from their love and support has been pivotal in my recent decisions.

So, my beautiful, loving friends I salute you. You all have my love and affection and i’ll be round soon to chew the fat for hours or even days and drink all your tea!

Blackpool. 10th January 2020

Friday 10th January.

Knock, Knock on the door. It’s my friend Meg.

“Wow look at you! You off out then?”

Yes, off to Blackpool.

“You look amazing mate. Here’s those keys and have a great day. Gimme a hug”

I went to Blackpool for a number of reasons but the main was to go visit an elderley relative in hospital as I was told “He’s very ill” by my mother.

He was a bit shocked when Mikki turned up.

“So, the clothes. Are you gay?”

No, Uncle not gay.

“Oh, so does it make you happy?”

Yes, uncle it does.

“Oh right. Well that’s good I suppose”

Next I went to visit some friends up at North Shore and spent a few hours with them and finally a night out with friends.

New Years Eve

It’s New Year’s Eve and tonight I’m off to friends over in Burnley to party!

The very same friends who got married a few weeks ago but this time I have somewhere to stay so can relax and let my hair down.

But first I’ve got to get through the day!

First thing is I need to run some family errands so I’m up bright and early. First off I need to sort my nails out and quickly after breakfast I sit and paint my nails. Rimmel Burgundy which looks ace on its own but when teamed with Clear Glitter Varnish looks absolutely amazeballs. I sit and listen to Dark side of the moon by Pink Floyd while I paint and wait for my nails to dry.

Next up I need to shave my legs because I haven’t done it for two weeks and they are getting hairy again. I was going to have them waxed but alas funds don’t stretch that far at the moment as work before Christmas has sucked arse and quite a few people havent paid me so they’re going to get nasty letters in the new year.

Anyway, I digress, time to shave the two tree trunks that masquerade as my legs and an hour later I’m done. Yes, an hour to get them smooth.

Note to self don’t leave it that long before you shave them again or save up and get them waxed again.

Hair washed and fully showered, I dry myself off and get dressed. I tied my hair into to pig tails and then tie these into a bun. Hopefully when I untie my hair later it will have some kind of curl to it. Well that’s the plan anyway. I’ve plastered my hair with Wella Shockwaves moose so hopefully they will stay curly for a while.

I’ll leave the house and drive over to my parents to drop my dog off, as they’ve agreed to look after her while I go out. She normally goes to a dog sitter but alas even dog sitters want to go out on New year’s Eve so my parents it is is. This means I’ve got a 50-mile detour to get to my ultimate destination, and coupled with the other slight detour I need to make to go and get my makeup done it’s going to be a heavy days drive. 186 miles in total. Thankfully the roads are quiet.

An hour later my dog’s deposited at my parents I wish them a happy New year and gave them both a hug and a kiss along with a nice bottle of wine.

I make my way to Born UK to see Paul Heaton to have my makeup done.

I arrive at Paul’s at 5 but alas I’ve put the wrong time in my diary. Sometimes I worry about the state of my mind when I do things like this and I do rely on my diary quite a lot but obviously it’s only as good as the information that’s put into it. Today I put the wrong time in so politely say sorry but have until 5:30 to wait. Paul shouts, “I’ve still got somebody with me” Oops, sorry Paul I’ll come back in a little while. Getting old sucks sometimes!

So, I retire to McDonald’s round the corner to get something to eat. Well can you call McDonald’s food “something to eat?”

At least the coffees in McDonald’s reasonable and I have 30 minutes to collect my thoughts before returning to Pauls for my makeover.

I return to Paul’s just slightly after 5:30 and I’ve taking a bottle of wine. Because firstly he’s working on New Year’s Eve to do my makeup and secondly he’s not going out tonight so he can have a glass of wine on me. So, by way of saying “Thank you for his invaluable help this year and helping me make the transition to Mikki”.

Paul has been one of the few people who listen to me talk and give me good advice and help and pointed me in the right direction for more information. His friendship is something I treasure, and I thank him for his help this year. Love you Paul.

We discuss my makeup requirements for the evening. Paul knows how important this evening is for me as I will be meeting some of my friends as Mikki for the first time.

I am nervous but I am also very excited about this.

It also feels a little strange to be sat in Paul’s studio not wearing a dress as I’ve had lots of errands to run today, I’m actually wearing jeans and a sweat top which is something I haven’t worn for quite some time.

I mentioned this to Paul, and we have a little laugh about it but as always he puts my mind at rest with “You can get dressed once I’ve done your makeup and made you look as fabulous as normal” <3

As this evening’s attire is a black and navy blue with polka dot 1950s dress, we decide on a neutral blue to black colour scheme and Paul begins the transformation. Moulding a lump of clay into a modern-day masterpiece.

We chat as Paul does my makeup but I’m going to have to be quiet for a minute. Don’t move as he does my eyes and my lips.

After an hour and 15 minutes we’re done and again I look at myself in the mirror and it feels a little strange because I’m not wearing a dress however I do look fantastic.

Paul leaves me in the studio so that I can get changed and I get my underwear, tights and all my accessories ready to go.

15 minutes later and I’m dressed but struggling to zip my dress up. I think this dress has shrunk in the wash. But I message Paul and he comes back to the studio and has me zipped up after a lot of breathing in.

I look at myself in the mirror and that’s more like it. This is me, this is who I love.

Only one more thing to do and that’s untie my hair. Let’s see if the tying up has made it go curly when it’s dried.

I untie my hair and it falls to my shoulders and it’s curly. However, I’m already wondering how long it’s going to stay like this so one tonne of hairspray later I’m hoping this will hold the curls in for a little bit longer.

I thank Paul for my makeup and the conversation and I give him a hug and he shows me out and I set off for my New Year’s Eve night out.

I arrive at the party house around 7:30 and am immediately presented with a joint and a glass of wine. They taste good.

There’s a few people here already and I go and greet all of them. “Wow, babes you look amazing”, “You look fantastic”, “Oh, my who’s done your makeup? You look fab”

This goes on while people arrive, some I’ve known for years and others I’ve known just a few months. Everyone is very happy to see me as Mikki and compliments are abounding.

I go to check my hair and guess what. All the curls have gone. Okay, tie it up with a matching blue scrunchy with ribbons in to and then pull a few strands down to the side. That’ll do! Damn my straight hair!!

One friend arrives. I’ve known him for 25 years and he’s never seen me dressed as Mikki or in full make up and he is speechless. First time in 25 years I’ve known him to be speechless. His girlfriend comes over and gives me a massive hug and a kiss on the lips. He’s still speechless. Either he is shocked, or he doesn’t know what to say.

So, I go over and give him a hug. He’s still speechless, he’s trying to speak to me but he’s struggling. So again, I try to break the ice.

“What do you think?”
“I’m struggling and need a bit of time to take this in. I know it’s you but in struggling to take it all in”
“Which bit are you struggling with mate?”
“You’re my friend and I love you but your different, you look like a bird!”
“Oh you, you noticed?”

With that I give him a massive hug and then a kiss on the cheek and leave a nice big kiss mark on the side of his face.

He chuckles, I chuckle, and I walk off and greet other guests who’ve just arrived.

He grabs my arm and I find myself saying “it’s alright mate, come speak to me in a bit” he is obviously struggling with me dressed as Mikki as he’s only ever known me as Mike.

I notice for the next hour he’s in deep conversation with his girlfriend and mine. He’s obviously struggling to get his head round this.

The evening goes on and I’m aware my presence as Mikki has gone down a storm with most, but a few are struggling with me especially after knowing me for so long.

I go and speak to them and a few folk ask me why so I explain this is who I am and always have been but I’ve chosen to express myself in public because its who I am.

In the background party games are going and there are shots flying everywhere and plenty of joints being passed around. I’m getting drunk and incredibly stoned but chilled.

My friend is sat on his own, so I go and sit down next to him.

“You alright?”
“Yes. I’m shocked”
“Why you shocked mate? You knew I told you months ago”
“I’m shocked at how good you look! I mean you look like a bird”
“That’s the whole point. What did you think I was going to look like?”
“I don’t know. I’m shocked!”
“Look, no matter what I look like, dress like, or do in my life I will always love you as my mate”
“I know but I’m struggling to cope with you dressed like this”
“I’m still your friend and this will never change”
“Give me time. I do love you, but I need time”

The night goes on and everyone is having a bloody amazing time. We all have a laugh and at midnight we gather as is the tradition. We sing Auld Lang Syne, drink a toast to the new year and give finger to the year that was 2019. Everyone hugs everyone and wish them Happy New Year.

I hope 2020 is a better year than most of 2019 has been. 2019 has been one of the worst years of my life but it has freed me from my oppression and brought Mikki into my life.

The party continues until the wee small hours but I’m past caring. I hug all my friends; we drink a little drink and have a little smoke.

I don’t know what happened to the rest of the evening. I don’t even remember what time I went to bed. I do know I woke up smelling of garlic and with a sore throat!!!!

So, either we had Garlic bread or I got throat raped by a vampire hunter!!!!

Happy New Year everyone.

Legs

I love my legs, they are my most redeeming feature. So I am told.

Heres some photos of my legs.

This gallery will grow as time goes on.

New Years Eve 2019/2020

New Years Eve 2019 and i’m sat in my friends house, last time I was here they got married which was the 27th December. I missed the party as I had to go home that evening but i’m not going to miss New Years Eve.

Dog at the dog sitter, makeup on and fancy frock.

I’ve met some of my friends tonight, people i’ve know in some cases for 25 years but this is the first time as Mikki.

Happy New Year my darlings.

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